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Twas The Day After Christmas

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This one actually has no dog in it, but it does have a lot of truth in it.
Why not celebrate Christmas (or Hanukkah) more simply and somewhat frugally, so the rest of the year you will have money in the bank to pay for dog food and vet bills ?

("The Night Before Christmas" seems to be irresistable to writers of doggerel. I wrote one while in college, but it was about being up late to work on a term paper in genetics. Nothing to do with dogs.)

Twas The Day After Christmas

by author unknown , © 12/31/2002

Twas the day after Christmas, and all through the house, Every creature was hurting -- even the mouse.

The toys were all broken, their batteries dead; Santa passed out, with some ice on his head.

Wrapping and ribbons just covered the floor, while Upstairs the family continued to snore.

And I in my T-shirt, new Reeboks and jeans, Went into the kitchen and started to clean.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the sink to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash, Tore open the curtains, and threw up the sash.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a little white truck, with an oversized mirror.

The driver was smiling, so lively and grand; The patch on his jacket said "U.S. Postman."

With a handful of bills, he grinned like a fox Then quickly he stuffed them into our mailbox.

Bill after bill, after bill, they still came. Whistling and shouting he called them by name:

"Now Dillard's, now Broadway's, now Penny's and Sears Here's Levitz's and Target's and Mervyn's--all here!!

To the tip or your limit, every store, every mall, Now chargeaway-chargeaway-chargeaway all!"

He whooped and he whistled as he finished his work. He filled up the box, and then turned with a jerk.

He sprang to his truck and he drove down the road, Driving much faster with just half a load.

Then I heard him exclaim with great holiday cheer, "ENJOY WHAT YOU GOT... YOU'LL BE PAYING ALL YEAR!"




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site author Pam Green copyright 2003
created 12/31/2002 revised 9/27/2020
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